Blu-ray Review: ‘Spy Kids: All the Time in the World’ Proves Utterly Wasteful

Submitted by mattmovieman on December 1, 2011 - 7:17am

CHICAGO – If this fourth “Spy Kids” installment proves anything at all, it’s that time has clearly run out on the franchise. While the original film was playfully inventive and preached resonant messages about family unity and the importance of teamwork, the series has followed the usual pattern of diminishing returns. After an eight-year hiatus, filmmaker Robert Rodriguez tried and failed to reboot the franchise with this soulless retread.

Though Rodriguez has earned the respect of his colleagues with his status as a self-made filmmaker, he’s gotten all too comfortable in his effortless excess. Since literally anything can happen in his green screen wonderland, does it matter that anything does? While Rodriguez continues to produce A-grade B-movies for adults, his family films often feel like dumbed down versions of traditional action blockbusters. With its shoddy effects and cheap gags, “Spy Kids: All the Time in the World” plays like a 90-minute toy commercial on a sugar high.

Blu-ray Rating: 1.0/5.0

Fresh-faced newcomers Rowan Blanchard and Mason Cook play the latest pair of precocious tykes who discover that their stepmom (Jessica Alba) is secretly a spy. When bad guys raid their house, they escape with the help of Argonaut, a robotic dog regrettably voiced by the great Ricky Gervais, whose detached one-liners do little to elevate the material. It’s not long before the kids enter the family business in order to solve the instantly obvious identity of the evil Time Keeper intent on stealing the world’s time. Sadly, all he ends up stealing is the audience’s patience with an endless array of clock-related puns. Jeremy Piven does what he can with his thankless role, which would’ve had the potential to be a lot more fun with the aid of a more imaginative script.

Spy Kids: All the Time in the World was released on Blu-ray and DVD on Nov. 22, 2011.
Photo credit: Anchor Bay Entertainment

Loud, garish and filled wall-to-wall with fart and barf jokes, “Spy Kids 4” is guaranteed to please no one apart from the most undiscriminating toddlers. Blanchard and Cook’s performances are pitched at the level of, “Hey look, mom! I’m in a ‘Spy Kids’ movie,” but this misfire is hardly their fault. It’s the mind-numbing approach and strangely joyless direction of Rodriguez that sinks the whole show. The childlike exuberance that he brought to earlier projects is conspicuously lacking from this by-the-numbers effort. Like “Scream 4” and “Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides,” this film fails to build a convincing argument as to why the franchise should continue beyond its intended trilogy. The dialogue is so painfully groan-inducing that it could make even the silliest kids roll their eyes. When one character defiantly argues that she’s just following her instincts, another character quips, “Well, your in-stinks!” Yet there’s one line that actually managed to succinctly summarize my disgusted reaction to the shrill monotony: “There’s got to be a better way to pass the time.”

“Spy Kids: All the Time in the World” is presented in 1080p High Definition (with a 1.78:1 aspect ratio), and is available in a four-disc set including a Blu-ray, Blu-ray 3D, DVD and digital copy of the film. Thankfully missing from the combo pack is the films’ theatrically released version in 4D “Aroma-Scope” which allowed Argonaut’s “butt bombs” to stink both literally and figuratively. Unfortunately, viewers must purchase a Full HD 3D TV, compatible 3D glasses, and a Full Blu-ray 3D player in order to experience full disappointment in three dimensions. Among the disposable extras are eight minutes of deleted scenes that feature further mediocre visual gags, such as an “invisible poncho” that’s no different from the Invisibility Cloak in “Harry Potter.”

In the sole endearing featurette, original “Spy Kids” stars Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara nostalgically reflect on the series while praising the new actors, who are admittedly more vibrant while out of character. Cook is a particular delight as he declares with wide-eyed seriousness that working alongside Vega and Sabara is “a true honor.” Die-hard fans will also appreciate the assortment of mini-docs on spy gadgets, behind-the-scenes mischief and Gervais, who may find it difficult to take jabs at overpaid stars after taking this paycheck for playing the butt-bombing dog.

‘Spy Kids: All the Time in the World’ is released by Anchor Bay Entertainment and stars Rowan Blanchard, Mason Cook, Jessica Alba, Joel McHale, Jeremy Piven, Alexa Vega, Daryl Sabara and Ricky Gervais. It was written and directed by Robert Rodriguez. It was released on Nov. 22, 2011. It is rated PG.