Film Review: ‘The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn -- Part 1’ Hardly Even Bewitches Twi-Hards

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CHICAGO – The bloated franchise’s worst film without question, the fourth “Twilight” popcorn flick is a futile exercise on the disappointment of anti-climactic waiting. Waiting for something more. Waiting for something bigger. For 117 minutes, you’re waiting – for something – but just not ever getting it. It doesn’t sparkle or shine. It flickers, and then disappointingly dies. Oscarman rating: 2.0/5.0
Rating: 2.0/5.0

The experience is much akin to every Chicago Cubs baseball game. Each and every time hardcore Cubs fans band together for their emotional attachment to their brand, they share the delusion that one day – even though it’s been a millennium – their team will actually win the World Series. “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1” pays more homage to that diseased Chicago Cub syndrome than it does to its Twi-hards and those who were forced to accompany them so they didn’t have to scream alone when Taylor Lautner rips off his shirt.

StarRead Adam Fendelman’s full review of “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1”.

And Jacob does – yet again – within literally the first five seconds of the film so he can remind you he’s still got those chiseled, Photoshop-perfect abs. Then the film is all downhill from there. The star of this film isn’t even any of its on-screen humans. It’s not even any of its vampires – though, thankfully, they’re no longer sparkly – or its nocturnal wolfs. It’s the film’s make-up and weight-loss department.

This time around, Kristen Stewart’s transformation as Bella Swan – from the healthy “I’ll love you forever, Edward” and “I beg for you to have sex with me, Edward” and “Please bite my neck and turn me into a dead, pulseless, cold, blood-sucking demon” and “Thank you for being suck a great friend, Jacob, even though I’m such a teasing tramp to you” to an ugly, sickly, bony and malnourished pregnant teen with a mysterious hybrid human/vampire baby – is actually Hollywood work at its best.

“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1” stars Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Kellan Lutz, Nikki Reed, Anna Kendrick, Jackson Rathbone, Ashley Greene, Billy Burke, Bronson Pelletier, Booboo Stewart, Michael Sheen, Gil Birmingham, Sarah Clarke, Ty Olsson, Peter Facinelli, Elizabeth Reaser and Christian Sloan from director Bill Condon and writer Melissa Rosenberg based on the novel by Stephenie Meyer. The film, which is rated “PG-13” for disturbing images, violence, sexuality/partial nudity and some thematic elements, has a running time of 117 minutes and opened on Nov. 18, 2011.

StarContinue for Adam Fendelman’s full “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1” review.

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson in The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn -- Part 1
Robert Pattinson (left) and Kristen Stewart in “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1”.
Image credit: Andrew Cooper

StarContinue for Adam Fendelman’s full “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn — Part 1” review.

Anonymous's picture

Y O U are W R O N G

Y O U are W R O N G …it was awesome

Anonymous's picture

holy cow , are you ever

holy cow , are you ever cynical…didn’t you get li$d last night…or why you spilling verbal vomit all over the place

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