(Blank) vs. (Blank): 10 Movies That Take on the Other

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CHICAGO – With the release of “Scott Pilgrim vs. the World,” there is a reminder of all the films in cinema history that dared to challenge something, within an existence that sometimes has trouble getting out of bed. Here are ten such films, filling in the holes of and taking on the mantle of (Blank) vs. (Blank).

Kramer vs. Kramer (1979)

Kramer vs. Kramer Photo credit: Columbia Pictures

This weeper did take on some pretty lofty issues in a post feminist society where gender roles – while loosening up considerably – were still pretty rigid. Meryl Streep does her usual scene stealing as Joanna Kramer, a frustrated wife and mother who shakes up circumstances by leaving her husband Ted (Dustin Hoffman) and their young boy Billy (Justin Henry).

Ted is forced to care for a child he’s barely known, and goes through a transition of his own. This Academy Award winning Best Picture made some very good observations about human nature, especially about stepping up to responsibilities when a situation seems hopeless.

HIGHLIGHT: Subtle things, like making french toast, impossible to Ted in the beginning, effortless once the survival routine kicks in.

The People vs. Larry Flynt (1996)

The People vs. Larry Flynt Photo credit: Columbia Pictures

Directed by the great Milos Forman, and featuring Woody Harrelson at his tour-de-force best as lovable pornographer Larry Flynt. In the age now where everything is sensitive (or can be used as a political football), it is refreshing to see a man stand up against the system, even though defending the antics and essence of Hustler Magazine takes some strong stomach.

The performances are great here, starting with Harrelson and filtering through Courtney Love (as Flynt’s wife Althea) and Edward Norton (as Flynt lawyer Alan Isaacman). Is this really what Freedom of Speech means? It took a lewd purveyor of dirty pictures to find out.

HIGHLIGHT: It’s impossible not to enjoy a film with the line (by Althea)…”The reign of Christian terror is over. We’re going back to our roots. We are porn again.”

Monsters vs. Aliens (2009)

Monsters vs. Aliens Photo credit: Dreamworks

In an animated epic that seems to make fun of everything, the jokes come quick and oftentimes without pausing for a breath.

When aliens invade the earth, it takes a secret government collective of monsters to defeat them, including an innocent named Susan (voiced by Reese Witherspoon) who has grown to monstrous proportions (she is dubbed Ginormica).

Completely and unapologetically over-the-top, the great voice casting includes Hugh Laurie as the evil genius Dr. Cockroach and Stephen Colbert doing his TV persona as President Hathaway.

HIGHLIGHT: How come the clothes don’t rip away when a person grows out of the them? Just asking. Okay, I thought the cartoon girl was fetching.

Joe Versus the Volcano (1990)

Joe Versus the Volcano Photo credit: Warner Bros.

The infamous Tom Hanks “flop,” JvsV has developed a cult following since its release. Basically a twist on “It’s a Wonderful Life,” Hanks plays a schmo whose doctor diagnoses him with a fatal “brain cloud.”

Thinking he has nothing to lose, Joe volunteers to leap into a volcano as a human sacrifice in exchange for unlimited access to a large credit line (an industrialist needs this sacrifice in order to extract mineral deposits on a remote island).

Meg Ryan plays the fated dual role as an early Joe date and the daughter of the industrialist. Drawing on the theme of appreciating life for what it can be, it also helps to have a decent steamer trunk that doesn’t leak.

HIGHLIGHT: The subject of many Tom-Hanks-is-vulnerable invectives over the years, second only to “Turner & Hooch.”

Billy the Kid vs. Dracula (1966)

Billy the Kid vs. Dracula Photo credit: Circle Productions

From the people who brought you “Jesse James Meets Frankenstein’s Daughter” (and boy, did he have some explaining to do with the wife), this film actually on the surface isn’t as absurd as one might think, given the current vampire craze.

The famed outlaw (Chuck Courtney) is engaged to be married, but his fiancee Betty (Melinda Plowman) is desired by Dracula (John Carradine) to be his vampire wife. And we all thought the Edward vs. Jacob was the stand-off of the millennium.

One of the great bizarro titles and B-movies of all time, made even better that long time character actor and Kung Fu David Carradine’s Dad was Dracula.

HIGHLIGHT: “I vant to suck your Colt .45.”

Mission Impossible vs. The Mob (1968)

Mission Impossible vs. The Mob Photo credit: Paramount Pictures

This film caused theater owners fits, because it often self-destructed only 10 seconds into the opening titles (hyyyyy-ooooh).

Basically a theatrical release that was an extension and combination of two episodes of the then popular TV spy show, featuring Peter Graves, Martin Landau, Barbara Bain and Greg Morris.

Their mission, if they chose to accept it, was apparently to infiltrate the “mob.” If there is anything to be learned by another TV sage, Tony Soprano, if one fights the mob, the mob usually wins. No wonder it was entitled Mission Impossible.

HIGHLIGHT: How could anyone not love Peter Grave’s white hair helmet?

Godzilla vs. Anyone

Godzilla vs The Thing (1964) Photo credit: Toho Company

Can’t we just leave a giant dragon lizard in peace? According to IMDb, it has been Godzilla vs. Mothra, the Thing, the Bionic Monster (we can rebuild him, we have the technology), King Kong, King Ghidorah, Megalon, Biorante, Gigan, Gullion, Mechagodzilla (evil twin?), Spacegodzilla, the Sea Monster (pictured), the Smog Monster and Bambi. Oh why does the world have it out for Godzilla?

And will we ever produce a worthy opponent? Suggested next opponent, Dick Cheney.

HIGHLIGHT: When Godzilla Met Sally? Worst Sequel Ever. However when Godzilla ate Meg Ryan, Rob Reiner’s mother did ask to have what the monster was having.

G-Men vs. The Black Dragon (1943)

G-Men vs. The Black Dragon Photo credit: Republic Pictures

One of the great serials of the 1940s (shown once a week at theaters with a “cliffhanger” to bring the kiddies back on a Saturday afternoon), G-Men V. BD was one of those WW2 propaganda-era plots in which the infamous Japanese Black Dragon Society (based on a real group) infiltrate the U.S. borders, only to pursued by Federal Agent Rex Bennett (Rod Cameron).

The Black Dragons are determined to undermine the fledgling war effort, so Rexy calls on British special agent Vivian Marsh (Constance Worth) and Chinese special agent Chang Sing (Roland Got) to help stop the expatriates. There is no political correctness in a foxhole, my friends.

There were 15 episodes in this particular series, and it was notable for the number of fistfights per episode. They were real men (and women) then.

HIGHLIGHT: No matter what the situation – fight, explosion or plane jumping – sexy Rexy Bennett looked great in that suit.

The Werewolf Versus the Vampire Woman (1971)

The Werewolf Vs. Vampire Woman Photo credit: Plata Films S.A.

Not content to stick to a fair fight, the Werewolf (Paul Naschy) goes after the Vampire ladies in this one. This grindhouse favorite has gratuitous nudity (natch) and the bloody battles that only the ‘70s era schlock can deliver.

The reviews are mixed on IMDb, but that only adds to the fun. The story involves Elvira and Genevive, who seek a Countess Wandessa in the modern French countryside.

It seems that Countess W is a 13th Century vampire, and the women also encounter the mysterious Waldemar (maybe J.K. Rowling saw the film), who is the Werewolf. Those two crazy kid monsters are bound to get together again for the first time.

HIGHLIGHT: Werewolf. There, wolf. There, castle. I thought you wanted to talk like this.

Lady Chatterly Versus Fanny Hill (1970)

Lady Chatterly Versus Fanny Hill Photo credit: Border Films

Finally the type of epic that pairs two great literary heroines in a race to find the secret behind the old sawmill. Nah, it’s a British sex comedy.

Two ladies of the evening are thrust into a bet between their “madams” as to who can seduce the un-seducable – a drag queen and a priest (you can’t make up jokes for this). Spoiler alert, it ends in a draw, but not before a lucky wine merchant gets his just desserts (wine and cheesy category).

Starring, believe or not, Joanna Lumley of “Absolutely Fabulous” as Fanny Hill. It’s time to pop the popcorn, as movie night is about to break out in the boudoirs across the land.

HIGHLIGHT: The beautiful thing in a rivalry like this, there are no losers.

By PATRICK McDONALD Senior Staff Writer HollywoodChicago.com [email protected]